Mama’s Boy

Daniel has turned into a full on “Mama’s Boy.”  I love it.  I’m frustrated by it. It’s definitely making me a little…crazy.

I love to oblige all his requests for hugs and pick-me-ups. He’s an awesome snuggler.  He always wants to be by my side and go where I go. I really can’t resist it when he says “I want Maaamaaa” in that little baby voice.  It’s super cute and I love to feel needed, to feel WANTED. He’s the most awesome kid ever.

But all this wonderful, over-the-top Mama Love is starting to morph into something else.  The new form is called the I DON’T EVER WANT TO BE AWAY FROM MAMA…EVER! form. DO YOU HEAR ME??  NEVER EVER!!  MAMA, DON’T LEAVE ME OR I WILL SCREAM LIKE YOU HAVE JUST DROPPED ME OFF ON THE STREET CORNER TO FEND FOR MYSELF.  I WILL CLAW AND GRAB YOU AND WEIGH YOU DOWN UNTIL YOU DIE FROM EMBARRASSMENT OR FROM BEING CRUSHED BY MY LOVE FOR YOU.

I exaggerate.  A little.

I decided to enroll Bean in the Gymboree Sports class for preschoolers.  It’s for 3 to 5 year olds and since he JUST turned 3, he is one of the younger kids enrolled in the class.  I had explained the class to him for weeks, always reminding him that it was a drop-off class and Mama would not stay in the room.  I would be waiting right outside the door and when he was done with the class we would hug and go and get chocolate milk.  I thought this would work.  He seemed fine with it all.  He really did.  He actually seemed EXCITED.

On the first day of class I introduced him to the teacher and he waltzed right in and sat on the mat.  Then the teacher closed the door.  It was fine for about 20 minutes.  Then I heard him crying.  Ugh.  My husband who was with me at the time peeked in the window and saw Bean holding the teacher’s hand and wailing.  Then Bean saw my husband and that was it.  He ran to the door and screamed to get out.  THEN, he saw me.  He climbed up on me and grabbed me so tight.  He refused go back in the classroom. I think he just panicked when he finally realized he was in that room without a parent.  Without his Mama.

I tried again the next week and this time Bean would not even go in the room.  He cried and screamed every time I tried to walk him through the doorway.  The awesome teachers kept trying to help me out but Bean just wanted “Mama.”  He wanted “Mama” and he wanted to go home.

I spoke to another Mom who has a son in the same class.  She told me it took about 5-6 weeks before her son would go in the class without screaming and crying.    YIKES.  That is a long time to go through all this.  She said I just have to keep coming and trying and finally one day it will just click and he will go in.  The Gymboree teachers said the exact same thing.  I get it, I do, but it just seems like a long, frustrating road to take. 

I know ALL MOMS go through this.  Whether it’s the first time you take your child to daycare, a new class, or a new school.  I just never thought of the NEGATIVES of being a stay-at-home-mom.  I think one negative is that I’m creating a child who is super attached to me.  And maybe I’m making it HARDER for him to be socialized and comfortable in a setting where I’m not there.

I guess I’m being a little dramatic.  This too shall pass. Just like EVERY OTHER WORRY I had about my son.  When will he sleep through the night? When will he give up the bottle? When will he walk?  When will he talk? 

When will he go into the world and not look back or want me there?

WOW. 

Maybe I should just hold onto my amazing baby boy a little longer and not worry so much.