I’m a girly girl. I’ve talked about it here before. My daughter is “girly” like me. She has a pink room with ballerina pictures on the wall and Hello Kitty bed sheets. She loves the princess movies. She has a dollhouse. She likes to dress up and put feathers in her hair.
But she also wants to be an animal doctor. She has a book about being President of the United States. She plays with trucks. She likes to build Lego towers. We like to do puzzles and play Memory together. She loves art and clay projects.
I believe a balance is fine. Annabel can put on her Cinderella dress with sparkly jewelry and play with pretend make-up. She will also help her brother set up the GeoTrax train set. We will read Fancy Nancy, but then we’ll practice the rhymes in Dr. Seuss’ Hop on Pop. We sing the Alphabet song as much as we sing Taylor Swift songs.
Speaking of Taylor Swift, Huffington Post writer Andrea Lampros wrote a piece telling moms NOT to take their daughters to see Taylor Swift in concert. She wrote about her dismay when she saw CoverGirl stands encouraging young concert-goers to get makeovers and try on lipsticks and eye shadows. (Taylor is a CoverGirl and CoverGirl was her concert sponsor.) Lampros did not like the message it sent to girls: You’re “not really beautiful until you cake your tiny, pre-pubescent face with makeup.”
I probably would let Annabel try on a little lip gloss and then we’d be on our way. You don’t have to go to extremes. I’m sure lots of high school girls wearing make-up are also honor roll students who have high self-esteem. If they don’t, is that Taylor Swift’s fault? I happen to think Taylor Swift is an amazing role model who is not only a successful pop star, but a talented singer-songwriter, musician, and philanthropist.
I do agree that young girls get targeted a lot more than young boys when it comes to product marketing and mixed messages. For example, this shirt was recently pulled from the JCPenney stores. Can you guess why?
It was a back-to-school shirt for girls sizes 7-16. Many bloggers made a stink about the message. Why do you have to be pretty OR smart? Why can’t you be both? Are they saying it’s BETTER to be pretty? And check out that tag line: Who has time for homework when there’s a new Justin Bieber album out? “Like, Oh Em Gee! I can’t do my multiplication tables when I’m listening to ‘U Smile!'” Gimme a break. (It also reminded me of THIS shirt that I wrote about two years ago.)
I don’t think we can avoid messages like this aimed at our young girls. Parents just have to be in charge. I need to be a strong role model for my daughter. I need to know what’s she’s buying and what she’s reading. I need to chaperone her concerts and her sleepovers. I will make sure she does her homework. I’ll encourage her to run for student government. I will take her to museums. She’ll volunteer.
But I will let her be “girly.” I will show her how to shave her legs and put on eyeliner. I will take her to get her ears pierced and I’m excited for our first mani/pedi together. We’ll have long talks about her dreams, her future, and what’s most important in life.
Over tea, of course.
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